UPDATE: April Fools! A leaked report from the UK governments Ministry of Sound has revealed that the Royal Mail is to be tasked with sending files, specifically those that had previously been destined for download over the internet (e.g. websites, ftp transfers, emails and VoIP calls), to consumers by post instead of digitally (online).

The move, which is part of increasing efforts to clamp down on illegal internet copyright infringement and is to be amended into the Digital Economy Act (DEA), has also been designed to take some of the growing capacity pressures off broadband ISPs by providing a more effective filtering of internet content and a faster delivery method.

As a result of the new measures it will also be necessary for the internet to be partially switched off at least once a week, for a maximum period of 24 hours, during which any requested files will instead be sent to people by post and at a set price per file (40p). Future updates to the law could also extend the period of downtime from 24 hours to several days, depending upon the schemes success.

The effort is being seen as an educational and common sense measure that the government claims will not harm ecommerce or present a problem for Net Neutrality (the principal of treating all internet traffic as equal). At the same time taking the internet into the offline world should also discourage further online piracy abuses.

Those seeking to update their Facebook profiles, Twitter accounts or send emails will instead need to issue a stamped letter, containing the related details, to your local Post Office; after which it will be batch processed and put online. Print outs of any websites that you may wish to visit will also be available, upon direct request, from your local Post Office.

Carrier pigeons, as pioneered last year by Timico, were also known to have been placed under consideration for the transport of crucial internet files and YouTube videos between two or more locations, although it's understood that none were available after an unnamed ISP hired the remaining pigeons to replace their existing customer support staff.

The new proposals have already received a warm welcome from Rights Holders and are set to go live before the end of this year.